What's not to love? There's cake, hot dogs, games, chaos, shrieking and presents. What kid can resist that combination. Besides, there's often a cool venue included like Chuck E. Cheese, Princess Palace, or Glitter Pie. Add to the mix loot bags, inevitably filled with dollar store crap or candy (who can afford to put nice stuff in loots bags for 10 or more kids?). But for the kids, the fun still appears to be mostly in the shrieking. Where do presents really factor into the fun? I'm about to find out.I'd say we're currently averaging about 15 birthday parties a year. That's alot of gifts. I hate shopping for gifts, not because I hate giving, but because I hate that there is a good chance the gifts I select are not what the recipient actually wants or needs. Maybe I'm deficient in the ability to perceive what people actually want. But there is something especially difficult about buying for the children of others. Maybe I just hate having toys in my house that are used once and then abandoned for toy purgatory. I have to assume at least some others feel the same way. But it's a tradition. I get that. Traditions can evolve, can't they?
I'm taking another small step. Starting today, with my kid's trip to her classmate's birthday party, I'm going to take a step that makes me a bit nervous of being judged as a radical fun killer. I'm going to send my daughter to that party with a charity gift card and a book instead of a present with a "fun factor". Www.CanadaHelps.org is a charity site where you can make an online donation or buy a gift card. The recipient of the card can direct their gift to any registered Canadian charity. I figure, it's learning experience. Parents and kids can talk about giving, and read about different charities and choose the one they like the best. Sounds more meaningful than another Polly Pocket or Little Pet Shop, no?
Okay, so my daughter suggested this morning that maybe it would be better to give a "more fun" present. She's worried about ostracism from the birthday circuit maybe? Just wait for what she has to say when it's her party and I request charity donations in lieu of gifts. Oh, and outlaw loot bags. Maybe then she will really be kicked off the circuit. Poor kid, she never signed up for my small steps campaign. Maybe one day she'll appreciate it as a move more important than another haul of plastic toys.
Or not.
you know I am in total agreement with your feeling there, but alas not as brave to buck the system - yet. I hate giving plastic crap and I'm not a fan of receiving plastic crap. I figure (or hope) kids birthday parties are more about the "birthday party experience" rather than the "what did people bring me" factor. I don't know if my kid would "get" the whole charity thing in lieu of presents on her b'day, but on the flip side, they have pretty short memories and at this age and are far more accepting that this is the way things are. So maybe you are right in doing it now, when they are less likely to argue about it or even feel as though they are missing out on something.......just wait until those peer pressure days start! aargh!.
ReplyDeleteIt's a hard habit to break isn't it? I also dread the peer pressure, but think that in some ways it's already starting. (ie. Bridget brought cookies for her snack today...why don't I ever get cookies for snack?)
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